hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Randomize
