doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
