yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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