How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
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