I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
