fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
