You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
