You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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