my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
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Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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