I puked a lego.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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