i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
ttyl tear gas
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Is it penis luge time yet?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Put some vodka in it
put some vodka in it
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.