That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
