Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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