How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Enjoy the penises
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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