i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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