I'm so fucking centered right now
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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