"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
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