are you so shy because you have an std?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
