I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
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Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
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When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
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Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore