he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
