P.S. I can't hear my feet
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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