life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
this hospital has no fireball
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
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