gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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