his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
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