You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
