If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Randomize
