the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
