just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
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