I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
