Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
