What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
