I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
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