I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize
