I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
