I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize