mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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