So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
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I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
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you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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