gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
