the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I love you. Go after that dick
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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