I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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