Christians are straight up FREAKS
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize
