A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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