Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
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She told me I should be a condom model.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
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I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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