I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
