The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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