don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Randomize
