your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
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