Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Randomize
