at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
