I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize