what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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