Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I want to fling myself into the sun
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize